Eat the Cookie...Buy the Shoes: Giving Yourself Permission to Lighten Up Page 9
I am sure that several funny things happen to you every day if you will learn to look for them and realize how important it is to stop for laughter.
Let’s stop to laugh:
Ever mindful of the congregation, the Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new dog, and they knew that the dog also had to be Baptist. They visited kennel after kennel and explained their needs. Finally, they found a kennel whose owner assured them he had just the dog they wanted. The owner brought the dog to meet the pastor and his wife.
“Fetch the Bible,” he commanded. The dog bounded to the bookshelf, scrutinized the books, located the Bible, and brought it to the owner.
“Now find Psalm 23,” he commanded. The dog dropped the Bible to the floor, and showing marvelous dexterity with his paws, leafed through, found the correct passage, and pointed to it with his paw.
The pastor and his wife were very impressed and purchased the dog. That evening, a group of church members came to visit. The pastor and his wife began to show off the dog, having him locate several Bible verses. The visitors were very impressed.
One man asked, “Can he do regular dog tricks, too?”
“I haven’t tried yet,” the pastor replied. He pointed his finger at the dog. “HEEL!” the pastor commanded. The dog immediately jumped on a chair, placed one paw on the pastor’s forehead, and began to howl.
The pastor looked at his wife in shock and said, “Good Lord! He’s Pentecostal!”
* * *
There was an airplane flying with four passengers. The pilot came back and said they were going to crash, but they only had three parachutes. He told them to decide among themselves who was going to get them. One was a Boy Scout, one was the smartest man in the world, one was an elderly man, and the last was a preacher. So, the preacher told them, “You take the parachutes because I know where I am going when I die and I am ready to go.” The intellectual said, “Well, I have to have a parachute because I am the smartest man in the world.” The elderly man told the preacher and the Boy Scout to take the two remaining parachutes because he had lived his life and was ready to go. The Boy Scout said, “There won’t be a problem because the smartest man in the world just jumped out of the airplane with my backpack on.”
* * *
The husband had just finished reading the book Man of the House. He stormed into the kitchen and walked directly up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, “From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I’m finished eating my meal, I expect a scrumptious dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you’re going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I’m finished with my bath, guess who’s going to dress me and comb my hair?”
His wife replied, “THE FUNERAL DIRECTOR!”
* * *
A child came home from Sunday School and told his mother that he had learned a new song about a cross-eyed bear named Gladly. It took his mother a while before she realized that the hymn was really “Gladly the Cross I’d Bear.”
* * *
I am desperate to laugh. I wasted too much of my life being mad and sad, and I have a lot of catching up to do. I am committed to taking every opportunity I can find to laugh; when I can’t find one, I am going to try to make one. I think Jesus was playful and funny. I can imagine Him teasing His disciples and playing pranks on them. Maybe you don’t see Jesus this way, but you cannot prove He wasn’t this way so don’t try to rain on my parade. I know that He was serious and sober minded, but He was always in perfect balance so He had to have humor, too.
If we look at the twelve men Jesus chose for disciples, it’s clear that He had to have a sense of humor. They were emotional and competitive. They frequently doubted and were filled with reasoning that was often humorous in itself. Peter said some fairly ridiculous things to Jesus during their journey together, but Jesus chose him, and the rest of His disciples. His choices were not mistakes; they were chosen on purpose. Surely, Jesus wanted us to see from the choices He made that He takes us as we are and is not at all bothered by our faults. They did have many flaws; nevertheless, when Jesus called, they followed.
I am sure the three years they trained with Jesus were intense, but they were balanced with humor and rest.
Try to Keep Up with Children
Research shows that adults laugh approximately twenty-five times a day. Actually, I think twenty-five sounds high for most of the adults I know and am around. It is 3:00 PM where I am at right now, and I think I may have laughed five times so far today—but I promise to try to meet my quota before bedtime.
Jesus told us to become like little children.
Jesus told us to become like little children. They can have fun in just about any kind of situation and they never fail to stop and laugh. According to statistics they laugh on average of four hundred times a day! I just spent five days with my one-year-old grandson, Travis, and I laughed more in those five days than I normally do in two months. He has learned to laugh out loud and so he does it for no reason at all. He just suddenly laughs out loud and then, when we laugh at him laughing, he laughs again and again. He does it as long as we will keep the game going. He discovered how to open my glasses case and starting putting his baby spoon in it. Each time he got it open he laughed. When we clap for his progress, he claps for himself and laughs again. I can assure you that he is not worried, anxious, or thinking about all of his mistakes in life. No wonder Jesus told us to become like little children if we wanted to enter and enjoy His kingdom.
Stop to Rest
Resting is very important and most of us need to do it a lot more often than we do. Whatever happened to recess? When we were children in school we had morning recess, lunch, and afternoon recess. These were all times to eat and/or play and they were within a six- or seven-hour period of time. Suddenly when high school started, recess disappeared! Did we stop needing it because we became teenagers? The older we get, it seems, the less recess we get. But perhaps it should be the other way around. I have worked really hard since I was about thirteen years old and I am becoming fonder of recess every day. Recess is simply a break in normal business that allows us time to rest and relax.
I am going to take a short recess and I will be right back!
Ten minutes later: I am back and I feel much better!
Before I took my ten-minute break, I had to go to the bathroom, was thirsty, hungry, and stiff. I solved all of those issues in ten minutes and now I feel refreshed. When you start feeling exhausted, when you hear yourself sighing frequently, when your muscles are tense, and when your creativity has been reduced to zero, it is time to stop! We usually feel that we must press on because the job has to be finished, but the truth is that a short break makes us better in every way. It also enables us to enjoy what we are doing instead of resenting it. We must learn to control our workload and never let it control us.
Take a break when you need one, because you are worth it. Give yourself permission to rest! You are a human being, not a human doing. I promise that it is OK to rest! We all have limits and it is foolish not to admit them. Some days my tank is not as full as other days and I have stopped trying to figure out why. I just stop before I am totally running on empty and sucking dirt into my carburetor. My dad was an automobile mechanic and he always said, “Never let your gas tank get empty because you will suck dirt into your carburetor.” If he found my gas tank close to empty he got upset, so I was careful to keep my tank at least half full. I wish I would have followed that advice with my life energy. If I had, I might have avoided some illness and laughed a lot more, and I am sure I would have accomplished just as much but enjoyed it more.
Most mistakes we make in life we cannot go back and undo, but we can learn from them and hopefully prevent someone else from making the same mistakes we did. So my advice to you from experience is: add more recesses into your life.
Take More Vacations
If I say, “Take mo
re vacations,” you might think that you would if you had more time off work or more money. But the truth is we can take vacations without money and we can take the time we do have and use it more wisely.
Try taking half days off, but don’t use them to run errands, unless, of course, they are fun ones. If you can take vacation in one-hour increments, try taking two hours off to go to lunch with a good friend or relative you enjoy. When you do take time off, refer to it as vacation, not time off. The word “vacation” has a nice feeling and a good emotional effect.
I think we actually hesitate to say that we are on vacation too often because we don’t want people to think we don’t work hard enough. When someone finds out that I am taking some time off they usually say, “Oh, are you going on vacation?” and I often feel that I need to justify it by saying, “Yes, but I will be doing some work, too.” I think I justified my existence on earth by working for so long that I still need to read my own books and take my own advice when it comes to the subject of vacation.
I recently spent some time with a friend who is an attorney and as I shared with him the things in this book, he told me that he had taken three days of vacation and also felt the need to justify taking time off. A co-worker had called him and asked what he was doing while he was off work. He responded that he was going to play some golf, but that he would be doing business by phone and e-mail. We should be able to take time off without working and not feel guilty. We don’t have to always be working in some way to justify our existence on earth.
Whenever possible, it’s a good idea to take one or two vacations each year consisting of a week or more because it usually takes us a couple of days to actually gear down and unwind enough to reach the level of real rest. In the meantime, take the day, half-day, two-hour, and ten-minute vacations that are important to make life more balanced. Use holidays to rest and do things that will refresh you, and be sure to be with people who will make you laugh. The next chapter of this book is dedicated to giving your soul a vacation, so get ready for more celebration!
Take the day, half-day, two-hour, and ten-minute vacations that are important to make life more balanced.
CHAPTER 11
Give Your Soul a Vacation
The subject of vacation is an important one, but our physical body is not the only part of us that needs vacation. Our souls need a vacation, too. Have you ever given your soul a vacation?
Your soul is comprised of your mind, will, and emotions, and it is a very important part of your entire being. You are a spiritual being and you live in a physical body. But if you don’t understand your soul and the needs that it has, you will not be a whole, healthy individual.
You can take a vacation, thinking that you need a physical rest, but if you don’t let your soul rest at the same time, you will return home just as exhausted as you were when you left. We can lie on the beach and worry, but that does not equal a vacation. We can take a day off and spend it emotionally upset trying to deal with personal problems, traffic, high prices, and rude people, and we would have been better off staying at work.
We can lie on the beach and worry, but that does not equal a vacation.
It is vitally important that we learn how to let our souls rest. Jesus said that if we are overburdened, weary, and worn out that we should come to Him and learn how He handled life. He said that He would give us rest for our souls. In the Amplified Translation of the Bible it says the type of rest He is talking about is recreation, refreshment, and blessed quiet for our souls. I pondered His statement and realized that Jesus was offering us a vacation for our souls (our inner lives). He offers us rest for our mind, wills, and emotions if we will come to Him and learn how He handles life.
Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest. [I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls.]
Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls,
For My yoke is wholesome (useful, good—not harsh, hard, sharp, or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and pleasant), and My burden is light and easy to be borne.
Matthew 11:28–30
The Cure for Stress
God’s answer to weariness is found in His word. He invites us to study how He lived and learn from His example the best way to handle situations in life. All people grow weary at times. Watchman Nee, a wonderful Chinese minister, said, “The world is indeed a wearisome place.” When we are weary we are exhausted in strength, endurance, vigor, or freshness and we are out of patience and tolerance. Our pleasure in life has been exhausted and we need help. We need to be refreshed not only physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. Being weary is not something to be ashamed of, but it is simply a sign that we need some help or a break.
Being weary is not something to be ashamed of, but it is simply a sign that we need some help or a break.
The principle I have shared so far of taking time to reward yourself on a regular basis will help you avoid a great deal of weariness. Those little pleasures in life such as a cookie, a pair of shoes, a nap, a walk in the park, a lunch with a friend, a manicure, a bubble bath, or a golf game actually help us more mentally and emotionally than they do physically. When our souls are rested, then our physical strength also increases. Do not fail to take the time to do these little things for yourself because they will help you immensely. But, the first thing we need to do when we feel weary is simply “come to Jesus.” Being in His Presence gives us rest and it also provides us with creative ideas on practical ways we can be restored.
Moses had grown weary as he attempted to lead the Israelites from Egypt to the Promised Land and God’s word to him was to let others help him (see Exodus 18:18). Sometimes we just need to admit that we need help and that we cannot do everything ourselves. Being needy is not something I was good at in my life and I have had to learn that asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but rather it is wise.
Moses had grown weary as he attempted to lead the Israelites from Egypt to the Promised Land and God’s word to him was to let others help him.
Moses was wearing himself out because he tried to do everything the people wanted him to do and, to be honest, we just cannot keep all of the people happy all of the time and not be worn out ourselves.
God surely knew that we would all need help because He sent us His Holy Spirit, Who is referred to as “The Helper.” Go ahead and say it: “I NEED HELP!” Asking is the first rule to receiving, so don’t be too prideful to ask for help.
Isaiah said that all people grow weary at times. No matter what our age is or how naturally strong we are, we all have limits and that is OK. It is OK if you cannot do it all. In fact, you can’t do it all. Isaiah’s instruction was to wait upon the Lord and be refreshed and renewed (see Isa. 40:28–31). Daniel said that Satan actually seeks to wear out the saints of God. We need to remember that: the devil wants us weary, worn out, and exhausted. He will push us until we have no strength left if we are not careful, because he knows that if we are exhausted we will think, say, and do foolish things; we won’t enjoy life and our witness to others will not be good.
All of the great men and women of God talked about being weary and how to recover once they became so. We can learn a great lesson from the Prophet Elijah.
Take a Break and Eat a Cake
Elijah was perhaps the greatest prophet in the Bible. God used him to do amazing things and yet we see the human side of Elijah. Elijah (with God’s help) made fools of and slaughtered 450 prophets of the heathen idol Baal. They had no machine guns or bombs in Elijah’s day, so I suppose he killed them with a sword. Just imagine how tired a person would be if they had a day like Elijah did. Not only did he kill 450 people but he also built an altar, dug a trench, cut a bull in pieces for a sacrifice, got four large jars of water from the well or brook, and repeated this process several times (see 1 Kings 18:21–
40). After that he climbed Mount Carmel to pray for rain while his servant looked for rain clouds as an answer to Elijah’s prayer to end a three years’ drought. When his servant reported that he saw a tiny cloud the size of a man’s hand, Elijah told King Ahab (Jezebel’s husband) to hitch up his chariot and flee because it was about to rain. Then, after the exhausting day Elijah had already had, the Bible says that “he girded up his loins and ran before Ahab to the entrance of Jezreel [nearly twenty miles] (1 Kings 18:46). He was most assuredly exhausted beyond anything I can imagine when this process was over.